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Sean, who sat beside me, leaned over and said quietly, "Al is really pissed off." He say anything?" He didn't want to talk."I acknowledged the information with a nod. The morning passed normally. At lunch, Al sat as far away from me as he could get. It looks like I've lost a friend, I said to the other voices in my head.I felt a wave of regret come from Arthur. Ursus thought, Al had no claim on Kirsten, and you can't help liking her. She's a jewel.I knew how Al felt about her. Why did you interfere?I'm in your head, remember? I feel what you feel, and yesterday I felt some of the strongest attraction for someone that I've ever felt. Looking through what you know about Kirsten, I don't blame you at all.But you made me fuck Al over.I doubt if Al ever had a shot with her.I knew he was right, but it seemed disrespectful to Al. What made you think that I had a shot?What? Do you need me to spell it out?I'm fat, ugly, slow, uncoordinated, shy, and get tongue-tied around girls.The voices in. When it all comes together it definitely makes our week.The FuckersFat people fuck. Old people, ugly people, plain people - they lick and suck and fuck like everyone else. You may know this intellectually but we know it because we've seen it. Not everyone has the looks or stamina of porn stars nor can we all achieve the positions they get into. But there's enough variety and ingenuity out there to delight even veterans like us.Now don't tune out: I'm not going to write about fat old ugly sex. I just want you to appreciate that when you take on an adventure like ours it's not the same as selecting the skinny-with-tits channel on a porn site. Often enough you take one look and mentally write a note begging them to draw the drapes. I never again want to watch an old lady sucking off her poodle. Once was too much: it was and remains a uniquely disturbing scene, one I'm stuck with forever. You can't unsee shit like that.So let's talk about the good ones. Like Brent and Claire (not.
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