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After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a ‘gripe sheet,’ which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics corrects the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers.By the way, UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.*P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.*P: Something loose in cockpitS: Something tightened in cockpit*P: Dead bugs on windshield.S: Live bugs on back-order.*P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.*P: Evidence of leak. Ben looked at me and smiled then winked his eye, and started pounding even harder on my mom. I hated Ben after that, I ran out the house across the street to Pete"s house my best friend. I told Pete what I saw, and he was like "dude, I'd kick his ass". I stayed that night at Pete's house I was too embarrassed to face my mom. The next day I went home, and mom acted like nothing happened. When Ben saw me, he grabbed his crotch and licked his tongue out at me. I flipped him off and said to myself oh, your day will come. About 2 months after that happened, we were all having dinner, mom Ben and I, when Ben mentioned that his mother was coming to town, and would need a place to stay. Allison, my mom was like so where is she going to sleep? You know the spare bedroom is full of all your tools and junk! Ben laughing say's, Ma can share the room with your boy, ha ha ha ha.. laughing and making that face he made when he was fucking my mom. Then mom asked, how long is she staying? Ben replied.
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