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Lovemaking between Sally and me was non-existent. We met briefly on the way to bed and even more briefly in the morning, and we hardly spoke. On Tuesday evening of the second week, I phoned home at nine to say I was coming home. There was no answer and the answer-phone was not switched on.Sally was home when I arrived half an hour later, but I had no energy to ask where she had been, and she did not tell me. On Wednesday I decided to finish early and was home by nine. Sally was home and working on her own stuff. We were both dead beat as we fell into bed and slept.On Thursday evening, I phoned again at about eight thirty. Again there was no reply. This time I did comment when I got home.“I phoned Tuesday and tonight and you weren’t home.” It was a bald statement: I had no energy to soften the remark even though it sounded accusatory.“I took Corrie to the hospital,” she said woodenly. “She always asks me in for a cup of tea afterwards. She’s someone to talk to. With you working so late. I would advise you to just hold your breath and keep quiet, finish your business as soon as possible and get out of the restroom.-The Jail Breaker: When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.-The Courtesy Flush: The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poop hits the water. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. Watch out when flushing. The force of the flush will more than likely get your ass all wet. It's worth getting your ass wet so you can avoid being caught doing the walk of shame.-The Walk Of Shame: This is walking from the stall, to the sink, and then to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and finds that you are the only one in this.
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