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Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust.Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more-talented fool.I'll bet you $4,567 you can't guess how much I owe my bookie.Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants.A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.Ever stop to think and forget to start again?When I married Mr. Right, I had no idea his first name was Always.My wife got 8 out 10 on her driver's test--the other two guys managed to jump out of her way.There may be no excuse for laziness, but I'm still looking.Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.Give me ambiguity or give me something else.He who laughs last thinks slowest.Is it wrong that only one company makes the game. Pam stared at Jack mutely. Jack sounded exactly like Daddy! And every time he called her 'baby-girl' his eyes changed to yellow. All this was her fault. If she hadn't sat on him, none of this would have happened. Daddy would have remained hidden. "Please, Jack, let me go! I've done everything you asked." Almost," Jack teased. "Show me your tits, and I might let you go."Jack's fierce eyes lacked compassion. "You promise?" "Yeah, sure," he sneered.Pam's head filled with indecision. She looked around to see if anyone was watching them. Hesitantly, she opened one button on the front of her dress but couldn't make herself go further. A tear rolled down her cheek. "Do I have to? You seemed like a nice man." You thought wrong!" he laughed as he ripped open the front of her dress, sending buttons flying."NO!" Pam screamed as Jack held her dress wide open, exposing her bare breasts."You got yourself some nice little tits! You know only sluts don't wear a bra!"A sharp pain made Jack shake his.
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