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But when he left he took it with him, as if in a sack carried over his shoulder. I lay in ruins, bruised, on my bed begging for its return. But it could not be. Impossible I knew, for he had taken my virginity. Could he be back again? My senses know it to be true. My body screams, but I know not in my favor. I hate him for what he had done, but my body loves him for what he had done, many times since. I am sure he is here, in my house, waiting for me, wanting me, ready to spirit me away. My nightgown is wet against my leg. Why I ask. Then I realize I know why. My body has betrayed me. Once again the traitor. I am wet down there, in anticipation of him and his evil. I cannot control it with my mind. My body’s needs are its own and I am its prisoner. For twenty one years I have lived with these desires, succumbing to some, defeating many others. The battle is constant. All because of him. My hate for him boils over. My lust does too. My brain and my body are mortal enemies. My brain. I did not say anymore to Janet as I drove. I only asked her where he lived as his mother had sold their farm shortly after her husband had died. Janet showed me and I saw the tow truck sitting in the driveway. I turned around and took Janet home dropping her at her house.“Ann, don’t do anything foolish,” Janet said to me as she got out of Jack’s truck. I just looked at her as she added, “Call me later.”I did not reply I just drove away. I drove back to Jack’s house, pulled behind the tow truck in his driveway, and parked. His house was a very nice little bungalow with a well-maintained yard. It was white with nicely designed shutters. It looked like it might be a two or maybe three-bedroom place. I got out and walked up to the front door. I rang the doorbell and Jack opened the door.“Ann,” Jack said.My hand went across his face slapping him as hard as I could as I asked, “How could you, Jack?”I shoved my way into his house. Jack closed the door behind me as he turned looking at me..
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