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She continued working all through her pregnancy, and had a beautiful black baby with an unknown father. My father would come and see me every now and then, but seemed to care very little for my mom. He was somewhat racist, and hated the fact that my mom was selling herself to black men, got pregnant, and she didnt know who the father was. My moms family, my dad, her friends, everyone saw her for what I suppose she truly was, a whore. Growing up a baby from a whore mom is not much different than a regular mom, though Ive never had another mom to compare her to. Deep inside, we are all whores I suppose, so its all the same. I never really lacked anything or had some form of hardship. She always had some money, and we never really lacked things.Thanks to her big breasts, me and my brother were well fed, and we loved sucking her tits. Not that I wouldnt eat, but I just loved the taste of her milk, and how close I felt to her while sucking her tits. Some of my first and fondest memories. Praying that she would somehow return to him. He tried to force himself to wake up, knowing that she would be cuddling to him and all of this was a product of his imaginaton.Josh had changed in these two years. His heart was like stone, he was too proud to call his parents for assistance, and he didn't have a penny in his pocket. He walked to the Pacific Garden Mission for his nightly meal of soup and bread with coffee. He didn't mind that he had to listen to a sermon before they fed him. He had grown a beard and his hair was long and uncombed. He was filthy from life on the streets. No one wanted to come near him. He noticed that people avoided him and he couldn't understand the reasoning of it. He lived in poverty but it didn't occur to him. He never spoke anymore. If asked a question, he ignored it. He had nothing to say to anyone. So he wandered listlessly staring at every long haired blond he ran across."Josh?" a voice from the past came to his ear. He walked on without turning.
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