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Bam. Needle in the dark. Bam. Broke heart. Bam. Heart attack at seventy. Bam. Dropped cold before grandson gets released.Last stop.There’s finality to it isn’t there? Once you pass it, then what? What happens? You don’t collect free parking. Not us anyway. You chase your way back to the beginning before the light fades to black, before the curtain drops. You do it all over, even if it’s all the same, cuz you don’t want it to end. You don’t want to end. But you know some day it’s gotta. Like I said. Irrational. No rhyme or reason. It’s all inevitable. Shouldn’t complain. Drives you insane that unknowable end.“Caution, approaching platform.”“Caution, approaching platform.”“Caution, doors opening. This is the last service of the night. Stay safe.”Safe. What does that even mean anymore?I stuff my pencils and my sketchbooks into my bag and step off.And there you are on a bench, knees drawn up. Even bundled in a long ratty sweatshirt with the hood pulled over your head, I know it’s you.. , "Daddy, are you OK?" He just put his head in his head in his hands and began to shake his head. I hugged him, he jerked slightly, then stopped. I whispered to him "I'm sorry for all this, and we'll get through it... I promise." He nodded, and reached around and hugged me back. There was a silent sigh of relief that moved through the entire room. My Mom yelled out, dinners ready. My Dad got up saying, "Hon, I'm not hungry, I think I'm going upstairs." My Mom, said, "OK hon, I'll save some for you anyway in case you get hungry later, you just lay down for a while, and I'll be up soon." With that, he headed up the stair. I don't think I've ever seen my Dad with a more beaten look on his face, for that matter on his entire body. I went to the dinner table and sat next to Mom. Dinner was a somber affair and after we did our chores, we all adjourned to our separate rooms. I cleaned up, did my homework, and got ready for bed. Well this was the day I'd been dreading, and I was still among.
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