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”“Then it makes sense that it’s bothering you because you don’t believe you can selflessly give yourself to others. There’s always something in it for you, so to speak. And that bothers you. Perhaps your dismissal of altruism was too hasty.”“Before I tell you what Bethany said, would you answer the question?”“No, I don’t feel like you are using me,” she said. “But, there is something we need to talk about. You first, though.”“What Bethany said is that I have very specific needs, related to my failed relationship with my mother, and that I try to please the women around me to prove that I can make them happy. So, in a sense, I’m using them to fill a need. But she made a point to say that they don’t feel used.”“I certainly don’t feel used. You care about me. You’ve admitted you love me. You aren’t IN LOVE with me, but you love me. Do you understand the distinction?”“Yes, absolutely. It’s what Bethany basically said - I care for all of the girls in my life, even if they are only in it. I awoke in the mourning laying on my belly a top of several pillows with my rump up in the air. Some how I stumbled to bathroom. I could feel his seed running down the inside of my thighs. (I wondered if he had left me in that position as part of his fertility rite I sat on the toilet and more slimy seed ran from my gapping womanhood' It was like I had been bored out, my vaginal lips hung slacky open as another glob of seed leaked from me. My whole sex was red and swollen, my nipples puffy and tender. I thought Wow that wasn't sex that was getting fucked. Yes that was the nasty word he had fucked the $%*@&* out of me. I reached for my douche in my bag and found it broken in half with a note that said,You don't need this, party tonight be ready momma at seven.Chapter 2I was exhausted and fell asleep right away, I dint think I have ever been so satisfied. Upon awaking around noon I felt all loose on the inside, laughing I wondered if that is what is meant by being a loose woman. If.
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