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Diana still insisted that she should "save herself" (at least what was left) for me until the wedding so we couldn't have sex, but that oral sex, at least me licking her, er, feminine parts didn't count. I pointed out that a US President had said that blowjobs don't count as sex either, but Diana was adamant that good girls didn't do that until after they were married. (Unfortunately, I later discovered she believes that decent wives don't do it either, at least not with their husbands.)I think this was about the time things really started to get weird. My fiancée was still very much the superheroine, flying off thither and yon, leaving me to take care of the house and wedding arrangements. But whereas before she was always successful in her exploits, now she came staggering home defeated time and again. She admitted that when she faced a criminal, or terrorist, or alien life form, more often than not, she wound up with some sort of male organ in her. She said that my being. "Here you are, dear!" he called as he came back, watching his wife who was now sitting on his swivel-chair and reading his prose, the cigarette lit and held in her right hand, occasionally flicking ash into his ashtray."Award-winning stuff this, Tone!" Margaret said with a sneer. "Listen to this. 'When Joe reached the bottom of the ladder and his feet trod on the orange Venusian sand, thirty-three luscious babes emerged from their pods, with the most fantastic bodies Joe had ever seen. They all had waists like hour-glasses and boobs like beach-balls.' What do you think of that?" Um... I dunno," Tony remarked, uncomfortable at the sound of his own prose."It's really strange, isn't it? I mean, forgetting that Venus is like thousands of degrees hot and nothing could live there, it's weird how this Joe just struck lucky. And 'boobs like beach-balls'. Sounds pretty gruesome to me. Is that the best way to describe breasts, do you think?" Erm..." blushed Tony. "It's rubbish, isn't it?".
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