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...When I was working back at my friend Rich's telephone business, we hired a new guy named Carl. Carl was one of these techy type guys, a real nerd, so to speak. He was smart though, I have to admit. Got something like a 790 on the math portion of his SAT's. He was really a smart guy and that was what we needed. Anyway, one day Carl was a bit excited...."Alan." Carl said."Yes, Carl." I answered."I think I invented a time machine." Um...what dude?" I asked cautiously."I think I invented a time machine."I started to think. I time machine, eh? I mean I know this is a fantasy, but what are we in cartoon land?"OK, Carl. You been smoking something good and not sharing again?" I asked."No, really man. Where do you want to go? I mean you tell me a time and place and I think I can send you there." Carl stated confidently.I started to think. There were so many possibilities. Did I want to go back to the dawn of creation and talk to God? Did I want to look over De Vinci's shoulder as he painted. Willpower be damned. I looked, and saw her still out there, applying more lotion. Unfortunately, her head jerked distinctly in my direction, spotting me, making me duck again. This was starting to get ridiculous. I thought, no, I'm not going to move my desk. No, I'm not going to look at her. No, I'm not going to be a lackey on these accounts and possibly jeopardize my position here at this admittedly awesome-paying job, especially with my wonder-boss being a little pissed at me right now. So, I proceeded, opening a particularly bothersome, annoying account that I wished would just “go away”. I was doing pretty good for a couple minutes when I figured I'd just “check up” on her and took a quick little peek out to see her running both hands slowly up her shiny, left leg. I tried to discern the colour of her nail-polish at this distance but couldn't, but the growing bulge in my spermed-out pants had no problem with the way the sun reflected and sparkled off her claws. My bulge also.
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