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After that she responded with a string of even more derogatory insults against my sex, and I kept up with her, letting out all my hate on this complete stranger. Half of our drunken insults didnt even make sense, but that didnt matter to either of us as we just ranted and drank. We spent the rest of the night drinking and cursing as the bar cleared out as the night wore on. Im hazy on the details, but we were ushered out when the bar closed at two in the morning. Then she looked at me and said, Im so drunk right now&hellip, I probably shouldnt drive home. My brain should have warned me, but like a fool I volunteered, I live in an apartment just down the street. Then we stumbled down the empty dark street, up the three long flight of stairs, and into my apartment. The place was a mess between the broken lamp still in shards where Id thrown it during the fight Id had with my girlfriend earlier that day, so only half the normal light came on when I flipped the switch. I showed her the. The second soldier was asked, “What about you, Corporal?”“Between the tips of the fingers of me outstretched arms, Sir!”, the corporal said.“Very good!”, replied the commander. The corporal, a man of considerable wingspan, was rewarded 8000 quid.Finally, the last soldier was addressed. “And you, Private, where would you like measured?”“From the tip of me penis to the base of me balls, Sir!”, retorted the private.The commander replied, “I must admit this is quite an unusual request, Private, but it’s your decision.” He ordered the private to drop his pants for the ensuing measurement. Immediately the general’s mouth fell agape and he stammered, “Where in God’s name are your gonads, Private?!!”The private proclaimed, “Goose Green, Falkland Islands, Sir!!”There was a little girl whose mother was very strict. Her mother tried to make her daughter behave in a very decent manner, but the girl was still three and half years old. One day the family went to a party, and in the middle of the.
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