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Their smiles to one another told me they were in similar states, although their dulling eyes told me they found my rambling a bit boring. What to do when passion fades, when reality intrudes upon the fantastic me I have managed to project in a night and morning?Eamon to the rescue.Roberta spotted him and called him to sit beside her. We were in a booth, Bronwen and I facing Roberta and the unevenness had bothered even me.He was an Irish guy, Irish Irish with brogue and all. Redheaded, bearded but way too tall to be a Leprechaun. It was clear Roberta was besotted with him. Equally clear that the reciprocal was not true, but that they knew each other biblically. I proceeded to interview him. It's what I do when I meet new people. He was funny and oblique and who the hell cared. We rambled about many things at once until it transpired that he had just received something we might all like to try together. Off we went to Eamon's, another creaky small apartment in a row house converted to. She rejected my sexual advances. She didn’t reject me.She was willing to allow me to express my feelings and accept them for what they were as long they were within boundaries. In my world prior to her there was no place for feelings because they would cloud your thinking and get you hurt. In my entire life up to meeting her there were only two people I trusted absolutely not to hurt me. My Grandmother and my sister. I include my mother in that list. I love my mother and she loved me, but she was an expert at making bad decisions that had painful consequences. The only person I trust absolutely today is my sister. If she told me to walk off the roof of a skyscraper I would ask her once if she was sure. If she said “yes.” I would do it. I figure she would have a good reason for needing me dead.To have someone who would let me love them and not try to use it against me was priceless. As our friendship deepened a psychic bond formed between us. Laugh, if you will. I was in my last class.
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