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”The first guy comes up to the gate and says, “I never, ever cheated on my wife and I love her.” So St. Peter gives him a Rolls Royce.The next man comes up and says, “I cheated on my wife a little but I still love her.” He gets a mustang and drives off into heaven.The next guy came up and said, “I cheated on my wife a lot.” He gets a scooter.Next day the guy that got the scooter was riding along and he saw the guy who owned the Rolls Royce crying.He asked, “Why are you crying you have such a nice car?” and the man sobbed, “My wife just went by on roller skates.”Phone Operator: “G’day mate ... Helpline here ... What’s theproblem?”Customer: “I’m in the Outback with the girlfriend and she’s been stungon her thigh by a hornet and now her vagina has completely closed up!”Australian Telephone Operator: “Bummer!”Customer: “Great advice! Thanks mate, bye.”One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very sexy nightie. “Tie me up,” she purred, “and you can do anything you. I start to feelsafe with him something that I don't understand, but embrace it anyway. He kisses my cheek then the lobe of my ear as he whispers to me, "if you want me to stop atany time please tell me my son. As he called me his son my jeans became very tight, I was so confused as half of me wanted to get out off there and the other half wanted to kiss him so badthat it was like my heart was going to rupture out of my chest. He carried on kissing my neck asone hand slides into my shirt resting on my spine, as his other hand stoked up my thigh over myfly, before undoing my pants. He smiled at me and asked "has my little boi got a gift for me?", Ishy nod before quitely saying yes da-daddy. He kissed me on the lips hard calling my his good boi, which sent a new feeling and the only thing that I could do was to warp my arm's round him. He giggled at me and asked me if I trusted him, I replied yes dad, he asked me to stand andget undressed. I did as he asked, he.
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I licked my fingers as I looked into his room and saw him lying on his bed with his iPad. Mike looked up at me and smiled as I walked over to the side of his bed and sat down and asked him if he was feeling alright. Mike looked at me for a few seconds then said he was feeling ok but couldn’t sleep because he had forgotten to do something for school so he was working on his iPad to finish it. I asked him if he finished whatever it was and he said he just did and smiled at me again and turned off his iPad. I told him good and that now he needed to get to sleep since it’s a school night and leaned over and gave him a tender kiss on his forehead and patted his shoulder before I got up from his bed and walked to his door.When I got to his door I looked back to see him watching me and then Mike said, “I love you Mom”, and smiled at me.I stopped, turned and walked back to his bedside and leaned over and gave my Son a kiss on his lips and patted his chest through the covers and told him, “I.

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