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So I started to wear my mother's clothes and soon began to love girdles and suspender belts and stockings. Best of all was her wedding dress...I saw myself as a bride to a commanding uniformed guy and this remained my ideal for years. I was quite innocent about all this until I reached an age where I began to wonder what was happening to me. I started to read the dictionary definitions. As a result I ran away from it all. forced myself to stop dressing, tried to date girls (disaster). University...had a girlfriend. Wild about one another but never even tried to have sex. A guy seduced me, fucked me and suddenly I thought 'this is who I am!' I had an unusual interest in transvestites and transsexuals, reading every book going but I was in denial and just saw myself as a passive gay guy. I totally repressed any inclination to wear female clothing. I got into the leather scene as a gay man. But always submissive. Submission became my focus. I endured a lot of sessions I really didn't. I played things in my head. Ran through so many happy memories in my life, all the way up to two years ago when I decided to go for a swim after a day at a construction site. That's where I met Cindy. Playing those scenes, those first words, the conversations, the way we came to be together. It was nothing short of miraculous, and now it was being denied me.I finally went to sleep. I woke up on my own, daylight not visible from the windowless holding cell. NO watch. Had no idea of the time. Dozed, drifted, until the hall door opened and another man came in and shoved a metal try of food under the door."Your breakfast." Thank you." Try it. You may take that back." I'm a veteran. I've endured meals in the middle of a sandstorm. I don't think your tray can beat that." Veteran?" Yeah. Army. Lieutenant, Engineers. Gulf War I." Really? I joined the army too late for that one and got out too early for the next one. Did you see anything?" I was, my platoon was tasked with blowing our way.
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