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Shethought I was "cool" and introduced me to a blow job. Introduced,practiced, and perfected it, in fact. When I finally got into her pants,I found out I was the first to get there. She walked around bow-legged alot, but with a smile on her face. She had no problem telling her girlfriends that I was her boyfriend, even though I was, alas, a geek. Ifound out, when we broke up and ALL of her friends wanted to "date" me,that she had blabbed about my endowment. Apparently, a large penis IS agirl's best friend! By the time I reached 10th grade, I was "stud oncall" for every one of the 1000+ 9th through 12th grade girls!Cheerleaders? All of them, including the JV ones. All of the Majorettes.Most of the Band girls. All of the Field Hockey and Basketball girls,except for the few who were clearly dykes. Goths, Punks, Freaks, andGymnasts? You bet! If it had two legs and wore a skirt, I was up for it!And, I *never* boasted the number of my conquests, or talked about theirrelative abilities in. All those payments are called the rice bowl...and woe betide the newly unemployed sap who fucked with the rice.The One reason Major League Soccer has such a poor television presence in America is because no one has figured out how to sneak in commercials. Soccer...called football in the rest of the world...is played with two 45 minute halves...and time doesn’t stop because somebody wants a commercial break. Shoot...time doesn’t stop if a player dies on the field. Action might stop...but time waits for no man.Meanwhile, the men were talking about me.“Ain’t she married?” At their favorite bar that was the number one question. Best answer?“Not anymore.”“Divorced?”“Widowed...maybe.”“Maybe?”“Husband disappeared during a summer snowstorm in Wyoming.”“Freak?” He was talking about the snow but that wasn’t the answer he got.“She’s pretty weird...but freaky? I don’t think so. Anybody heard anything bad about her?”The answer to that was, “She’s got three kids.”“They running wild?” Hopeful...not.
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