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You even told the others not to worry and that it would be all right. Were you in denial, or did you really think that everything would still turn out okay?"Just one more day," you said, each morning of the week, and now look what happened. You of all people should have known better, and now you have no one to blame but yourself.I know you're standing there thinking of all the time and effort that went into it, not to mention the expense. Don't forget the disappointment either. Remember how sure you were that everything would work out?One of the biggest problems is that it not only affects you, but it has a tremendous impact on the others in your family as well. Everyone was expecting it to be there, counting on it in fact, even you and now it's simply gone. Can't you see the disappointment and anger in their faces?"What are you going to say to them? What is done is done? What good will that do? You needed it and so did they, and because you weren't careful it's not there. Sometimes. ‘Now, please don’t run off anywhere before I get up!’ he said with a smile. ‘I’ll see you in the morning.’ He turned and left the room. I remained in front of the fire, trying to comprehend the new twist in my life. Once again in this place in the Japanese countryside, I felt the lifting of an enormous weight from my soul, but there was also a deeper well of regret. For the first time, I realized that in my attempt to atone for my sins, I had caused greater pain to the innocent. Perhaps my flaws weren’t insurmountable. There was someone who will accept me. Someone to love me despite the unbelievably stupid things I’ve done. How could I have been such a fool? An incredible hunger rose within me. I could not live another minute unless he held me in his arms and touched me the way he used to. I quickly left the room and went up the stairs. I quietly opened the door to the room on the top floor. I saw Sasha in the bed, he rolled over and held the quilt up to invite me to join him. When.
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