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A few more months passed by and the fact that Carly was so hot was no longer compensating for the frustration of her being poor at her job. I had spoken to Carly several times to try and improve what she was doing but there had been no improvement. Today was the day that I was going to have to tell Carly that I was going to end her contract. As we worked in the meeting room I thought how good she looked in her tight cream coloured trousers that showed her perfect arse off to its maximum. As she moved in front of me I could see that Carly must be wearing a thong as any normal panties would have been visible in such tight trouser and all I could see was two lovely ass cheeks. As we sat down I could see that Carlys top button of her black blouse had come unbuttoned showing her nice sized breasts. A question again came into my mind that did I really want to get rig of such a hot employee? I knew what I had to do this and I began the conversation. From the start it was obvious that Carly. She was doing exactly the same thing only she was completely out of control and too wrapped up in her own problems to realise that I was in trouble and needed help too. She was the only one that understood it but I couldn’t even unload my issues on her. She didn’t need my problems as well as her own. Hearing your friend tell you that she cuts herself rather than talk about her feelings is indescribable. I completely froze and prayed that she was joking. But she wasn’t. That evening I cut my hand in an attempt to shock her into quitting. She saw it the next day. She was hurt but my plan failed. I know that was ridiculously stupid. The shame you feel after hurting yourself to cope is difficult to deal with and I’ll be honest and say that the shame sometimes made me feel so bad that I actually harmed myself twice in the space of a few minutes. The term vicious cycle has been used to describe self-harm. I completely agree. It’s exactly the right term to use. You feel bad,.
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