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When I asked why, he told me that an elderly woman had come in and asked if there were any ‘niggers’ in the kitchen and that she wouldn’t eat if anyone Black cooked the food. The manager told my husband, the only white cook, to cook this woman’s food, instead of telling the woman that she should leave. My husband quit, rather than become a cog in this restaurant’s machine of discrimination. I hope these words make you think. Velvet.*** * * * * * She was going to be trouble. Breakfast manager Ham Trilborne knew that the old wiry woman was going to be trouble. She checked the seat before she sat down, examined the menu before accepting it from Judy, the waitress and held it by the corners, as if it was oozing with disease. She looked it over for a few minutes, then set it aside, using several napkins to scour her fingertips clean. Ham watched as Judy approached the table again, pulling out her order pad and asking for the woman’s order. Then Judy’s face went completely white. Trouble.. She said “I knew it, asshole, explain the dildo!” He said, “Explain the kids!”A few months after his parents were divorced, little Johnny passed by his mom’s bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, “I need a man, I need a man!” Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times. One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her. Little Johnny ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning, “Ohh, I need a bike! I need a bike!”Kid 1: “Hey, I bet you’re still a virgin.”Kid 2: “Yeah, I was a virgin until last night.”Kid 1: “As if.”Kid 2: “Yeah, just ask your sister.”Kid 1: “I don’t have a sister.”Kid 2: “You will in about nine months.”A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex. The doctor gives her a pill, but warns her that it’s still experimental. He tells her to slip it into his mashed potatoes.
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