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Now I understood how prostitutes could be intimate with a client and yet feel nothing. Previously I could not comprehend such a thing since lying naked beside a man had seemed so intimate and soul bearing. And yet now here I was with Steve, my amber honey-colored Asian skin naked against his hard male white flesh and I felt nothing. It scared me to feel this way, to feel so disconnected, but I steeled myself and held my nerve. My hips slowed as I sensed Steve was close to coming. I didn’t want to end it before he had a chance to look in my eyes. I wanted to give him a final chance, to test him a final time. I let our eyes connect wanting him to see my pain, wanting him to understand. If he could see it, see my pain, then perhaps anything was possible; even “us”? Yet he was oblivious? Perhaps this is the nature of men when they are having sex, they don’t see the woman’s pain? I don’t know? I was lost in my own obtuse thoughts. I knew it was time to let Steve go. I let my hips thrust. "Look," I protested, "I don't know who any of you people are. I don't knowwhat you all have against me. And I definitely don't know where thisMachine of yours is." Okay," said Dawson, raising a hand to cut me off. "This amnesia bit mightbe real and it might not be. I'm willing to bet that it is. But I thinkthat even if it is, you probably know some things that you don't think youknow. So we're gonna hook up-" No," said Elizabeth forcefully. "Not you. Not. You."Dawson held up a hand to quiet her. "But if you are faking it, then youmight be getting some ideas about putting bad commands in my head. So, cuethe incentive."He gestured, and a box was wheeled out in front of me, identical to the onethat I had been trapped in. They opened the lid and a woman sprung out ofit like a jack-in-the box. She climbed out, looking nervously around theroom with a confused, hysterical expression.She was twenty years older, thirty pounds heavier, and her black hair wasstreaked with grey, but I recognized.
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