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I couldn't though. I knew I was a stand-in for my dead brother, and the second choice. She tried to make me feel like she wanted to fuck me for me, but I wasn't buying it. Finally after she came a couple of time, she gave up on me doing the same. My heart just wasn't in it.She gave me a warm goodbye kiss telling me that she thanked me for helping her hold on to Rad's memory a little more. She left and I was sad myself.She left for college two months later. I didn't see her for years.Chapter FiveThe sex I had with June had to last me until college, as I never had the chance again. Dad was trying to teach me the business, having given up on Carson. Neil was diagnosed with AIDS shortly after the end of my freshman year, and we knew it was only a matter of time before he too died. Dad visited him on the west coast and tried to make amends, but neither of them really accepted the other. Mom refused to go - no child of hers could have that GAY disease! Carson also didn't go because he was. Would anal sex hurt? Possibly, but it could be avoided or lessened with the right lube and teaching Seth how to do it. Seth wasn't a virgin, but he'd never done anal before.I was too shy to buy the lube myself, so I made Seth do it. I didn't want our first time to be in a car, so we both skipped 7th and 8th period to go to my house two hours before my parents would get home. That would make sure we wouldn't be interrupted. And even though we had made out and played with each other so many times, I was still very nervous.I don't remember what I wore that day, or what Seth wore. But after closing the door, he began to slowly undress me, kissing me softly. I think he knew this was a big deal for me and I really appreciated how respectful he was being. It wouldn't always be this way, but for today it would be.We had talked about using lots of lube and after we both got undressed, Seth rolled me onto my tummy and raised my ass in the air. Spreading my cheeks, he squirted some lube on my.
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