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Making things worse is that I didn't have even a minimal set of dating skills or the confidence to even try.I spent some time considering the idea of quitting my job -- I'm a techie -- and then just touring the country before the Sa'arm could arrive and make a mess out of it. I just carried on as best I could and worked in my cube more often than not, just to have some people around me, instead of tele-commuting from an empty house.Sure, I've tended to think of myself as something of a loner ... but human contact was something that I had developed a craving for, even if I wasn't very good at all of the little niceties of socializing.When I did finally go for my CAP interview I did not linger when I reached the lobby to get my new ID card. I barely glanced at the card, much less the receptionist, as I just zoomed out the door at full speed, avoiding the thought of failing.Like I said, I don't have a lot of patience.With already having pretty low expectations for my CAP score I was not. I had a weird experience when Sophia got home from school a littlewhile later: she asked *me* what it was like to have a pelvic exam.Back when I'd first transformed, I'd never expected her to be the oneasking me about some feminine thing I'd experienced and she hadn't.But then, the stories I'd read had given me the impression that all girlshad gynecological exams every year or so from the start of puberty tomenopause; Mom often took us to the doctor at different times, and I'dnever felt comfortable asking Sophia about her doctor's appointments,just assuming she must be having those weird girl exams I'd read vaguementions of. So I told her what it had felt like, and how Dr. Chaudharihad reported that my girl bits were all in working order, and theconversation drifted to the topic of babies and how many we wanted tohave and when."I don't want to have babies until I'm at least thirty," Sophia declared."And then probably just one, or maybe two." It depends on how soon I find the right.
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