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Do I really want to do this? Won't I catch an STD? Could I be murdered by some psychopath? There were all sorts of reasons that I hesitated yet I continued to be drawn to the idea of doing this. In addition, I had never cheated on my wife up to this point and while we hadn't had sex in a while, I didn't want to be unfaithful. Between the first time angst and the moral dilemma, I spent a couple of months in limbo not making a move. Finally, my wantoness got the best of me and I put up a post about wanting to suck my first cock. I immediately got about a half dozen inquiries. Four of them were probably dudes similar to me, getting off on the idea of hooking up but too nervous to go through with it. Two of the responses seemed more genuine. One of them didn't work out logistically and the last one seemed like it would work. Unfortunately, as I have found out on multiple subsequent occasions, guys will flake out. We had set-up a time to meet and then, at the last minute, he cancelled. I. I was destroyed. I put all of my energy into building my own company and bought the company I’d worked for. The turn over happened today and although what I’d started to do was kind of a revenge thing it didn’t end up that way. I made sure both of them left the company with a good leg up to start over.’ I sat there thinking for a moment. Aside from my family maybe two other people knew what I’d just told this woman. A perfect stranger. For the past five years that hurt has eaten at me. I sighed, thinking of the amazing six months I’d had with Vanessa. ‘Maybe I was too harsh, I don’t know. Thinking back I’m pretty sure I could take some of the blame for what happened. I doubt Barnes even knew I was fucking Vanessa. I was pretty damn stupid back then.’ ‘Wow,’ she said quietly. ‘I’m so sorry!’ ‘Yeah, I know.’ I said with regret in my voice. ‘I was at a Valentine’s dance at my college tonight, we were having a good time.’ ‘Maybe twenty’, I thought to myself. ‘One of the guys from my.
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