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Yes, indeed, I am a ‘scion’, to use their word, of what is considered in upper class American society, to use again their words, ‘an old family’. Old and good families, whatever they are, always lumber their offspring with names that no normal person would ever think of using. Sebastian is bad enough, and I am always addressed as Sebastian and never, ever as Seb, but I ask you, Aloysius Mortimer—where on earth did my late parents ever dig up these prehistoric names? What on earth were they thinking about when they lumbered their only child with them? But that is precisely what ‘old families’ do. What the hell is an old family anyway – aren't all families old? Well, I will tell you: an old family is one which has been rich enough or influential enough over the years as to keep track of its family history - who married whom and how many children and so on and so forth. And so, they are able to tell you that their line dates back to before the war of independence or whenever. In fact. *Click, click, click.* The sound of approaching heels. *Click, click, click.* Tawny looked up at Andy, who eyes were open wide. He heard them too. Her door opened with a flourish, and in walked her mom, clad in only thigh-highs and heels. Tawny, who was also now looking at her, glared at her mother and said in a whisper, "Ever the bitch…”"Hope you saved some for me," Tammy said. Andy looked like it was his mother that had just walked in instead of Tawny's. He sat up and stared at Tammy who was standing at the door looking like a pornslut. "What the fuck is going on," he asked aloud, and looking like he'd seen a ghost. The two women looked at each other, and then back towards him. They smiled at him, his look of confusion remained. Tammy approached, and got down onto the bed next to her daughter. Their faces were level, and to Andy's utter shock, they both leaned forward and kissed, and not in the way a mother and daughter typically kissed. This was loud, sloppy, and passionate. He.
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