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“You have chickens. Chickens are farm animals.”“They’re birds,” Jane said. “Farm animals are cows, goats, sheeps, and pigs.”“Chickens are farm animals.”“How about turkeys?” Jane asked.“Do you have turkeys?” Jack asked.“Just some wild ones that are in the woods behind the house,” Jane answered.“Turkeys are not farm animals.”“So we could have turkeys?” Jane asked.“Domesticated turkeys are farm animals.”“That’s stupid,” Jane said. “A turkey is a turkey.”Jack said, “I have to see the chickens.”“Why?” Jane asked.“I need to see them.”“Well, you can’t,” Jane said.“I’m going to walk around to the back of your house...”Jane was not a lawyer and her understanding of the law was pretty basic. She knew that government officials couldn’t just walk around on private property performing a search without an appropriate search warrant. She wasn’t even sure if a dog catcher could even get a search warrant. There was no way that she was going to let someone who hadn’t even shown her official. I say tension because my fears and fantasy have always been augmented by the sound of vibration its glass chandelier makes in sympathy with a click, click, click from the room above. The noise, caused by high heel shoes striding across a stone tiled floor served to remind me of the location of the main dungeon. On occasions, such clicks would be interrupted by a sharp thwack of leather, a strident voice or the sound of chains indicating a session was in progress.However, I digress, for today I leave Australia and have my last chance to partake in that fantasy of fantasies, a somewhat cacophonous demonstration of the art of domination and humiliation. Booked for the occasion is Justine, a fabulous, feminine, Aussie feline whose heels I had expected to click at oh-nine-forty-five. Anyhow following a further phone call, I am due on parade at ten-hundred. I thus leave my room in a state of some anxiety.The lift from the 23rd floor seems to take an age as I desperately do not want to meet.
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